The honeymoon days glow hot and bothered, draped in lace and dripping sweat, but truly great relationships take work. In other news, feeling good requires healthy food, and learning requires reading and studying. Saving money means spending less. Maybe you see where I’m going. Everything worth having in life takes work. Sometimes, though, this work feels fun. Today, couples can enjoy the effort of nourishing their relationship through a wide range of sex games, spanning apps and cards, dice and board games, and even simple games played with imagination alone. Each of these options build communication and open new doors to deeper intimacy, as you set aside yourself and submit to some fun.
I know, from personal experience, the many flavors and shades of intimacy issues, paralyzing in the heat of the moment, and also paralyzing towards emotional development.
Whether you’re in a long-term relationship or just getting to know your new partner, games offer an optimal method for fostering a rich connection. Built on laughter, problem-solving, teamwork, competition, and strategy, every variety of game centers around the relationship between players, whether playing for the same team or competing against each other. Continue reading to learn how a couple sex games like strip poker and sex dice create fun avenues to do the work that’ll keep your relationship strong. Roll up your sleeves, find someone scintillating, and let’s get kinky!
Before You Play Sex Games: Do’s and Don’t
Sometimes even sex games can produce a bit of drag, stemming from something even deeper than the effort exerted to learn and get the hang of their rules. I know, from personal experience, the many flavors and shades of intimacy issues, paralyzing in the heat of the moment, and also paralyzing towards emotional development. Here’s a few things to think about before you make the next move, to buoy your bounce into game play.
DO Live in the Moment
We are alive but for an instant. Command this brief expanse of time by making the most of your life—building relationships, experiencing sensations, and exploring unknown emotional territory. These activities are your birthright, yours to enjoy regardless of how suave or sexy you might feel on a given day. If fear or self-consciousness start creeping in during your sexy game, keep this fact front and center. Life is for living and the moment is now.
DON’T Worry If They’re Having Fun
To expand upon the point above, do not distract yourself from the sensuality of this moment by projecting your fears onto your partner. As you set out on the first moves of your sex games, restrain the desire to monitor their every move, anxiously deciding whether they’re having enough fun or not. Take a breath, feel your skin, and return your awareness to the moment.
DO Pay Attention to Their Pleasure
That being said, sex games take at least two to tango, even if you get off on a power imbalance. Pay attention to the pace of your partner’s breathing, the flush of their cheeks and sparkle in their eyes. Focus on maximizing their pleasure, and they’ll do the same for you, a classic upward spiral. A win/win situation in even the most contentious sex game.
DON’T Push Boundaries
Couples that have been together longer might have a better sense of each other’s non-verbal cues. If you’re playing something a little easier and lighthearted like sex dice or strip poker, you can gently ask your partner’s permission before trying a move that’s outside your collective comfort zone. When playing something more intensive like a bondage game, you should ALWAYS acknowledge safe words graciously and succinctly. Pushing boundaries requires the consent of both parties.
DO Get Competitive
Now, this one might feel a little counterintuitive here, but there’s a reason the “enemies to friends” trope of romance reigns throughout pop culture. Competition actually makes a sexy game even sexier. It gets the blood going and takes us into the moment. It lubricates the mind, and sometimes even lubricates the body, if you catch my drift. Higher heart rates are the end goal one way or another, so try a bit of competition for an appetizer to tide you over until dessert 😉
DON’T Get Lost in the Rules
Most of all, remember the point of any adult sex game lies in closer relationships, joint fun, and maybe even stronger orgasms. Like relationships themselves, the route there is non-linear and best with flexibility. Feel free to bend the rules to suit your aims, even leaving off when a particular distraction proves tantalizing. After all, winning a sex game for couples is all about you, your lover, and your love. Now, continue reading for our roundup!
Sex Games to Get Spicy With
Best Sex Dice: Fly-Love Party Dice
As we mentioned earlier, sex dice offer some of the best couples sex games for beginners. Really, they can be used by any number of people, in case you’re looking to accommodate a larger crowd. No judgement. Simply roll the dice and perform the results. This set of sex dice comes with six differently labeled pieces, so you can customize the bent of your combinations to suit the situation. Get dirty or have fun with one easy roll of the dice.
Best DIY Game: Jar of Desire
Who says you have to buy pieces to play games? We’re working with the mind to elicit chemical responses, and even a simple, easy premise can achieve that result. We like this idea from certified sex therapist Michelle Herzog, LMFT, CST: “My favorite one to suggest to the couples I work with includes each person in the couple to write out 10 to 15 sexual-based questions, topics, or likes/things they’d like to try, then place them in the jar.” You can let the entries sit and pull them out at your own pace, on a rainy day or steamy night. This distance between the time of writing them and the eventual time they’ll be read might just inspire players to get a little out of their comfort zone. If you’d still like to buy something to play this game, go for the jar we’ve linked above!
Most Creative: Love Is Art Kit – Cosmos
Nothing tongue in cheek about this one, it’s actually just a beautiful idea. “LOVE IS ART was founded by Atlanta based artist Jeremy Brown in 2008,” reads the company’s info. “Brown began making paintings through this process in college after being inspired by the late 1960’s French artist Yves Klein, who would cover nude models in paint and gently press them against blank canvases.” Brown assembled a kit for a friend who said she’d like to make one with her husband for their anniversary. Today, there’s dozens of Love Is Art kits available. Each one generally comes with a tarp, canvas, slippers, scrubbers and paint–lovers will have to stretch their own canvases after the fact. The Cosmos edition of this kit features distinct ranges of colors and a canvas prepped with stars for a galaxy of creation. This kit proves the saying from which it takes its name.
Best Update on Strip Poker: Poker for Lovers
Strip poker might be the most popular sex game out there, and for good reason. It’s definitely the most notorious. Armed with the double whammy of nudity and skimpy Las Vegas connotations, just the title of this game can prove a turn on. Poker for Lovers capitalizes on that cache while optimizing their adult poker for maximum sex appeal. Each chip lists a sexy command that must be performed for the winner in order to pay back the debt. “My wife and I have a lot of fun with this game,” writes one review. “I think the delay in the foreplay by playing cards and the randomness of who is doing well makes my wife and I both like this game.” Ante up!
Best App: Eforia
Tangentially in accordance with Rule #34 of the internet, app stores are also proliferated with a barrage of sex games for couples. Out of all the duplicates and cheap gimmicks out there, Eforia actually uses your device to introduce a new kind of game that might not be otherwise possible. The app hosts an endless wealth of roleplay scenarios, tailored to you and your partner and your interests. You can select a story or choose to be surprised, and enact an entire adventure that you choose, plot point by plot point. This seems like a pretty foolproof way to begin playing adult sex games with your partner, or to try a new sexy game for a seasoned couple.
Best for Adrenaline Junkies: O-ing Tower
If high octane thrills like bungee jumping and freefall roller coasters have left you and your partner in a drought, scraping after that old adrenaline high, then look no further than the O-ing Tower. Seriously, what could be more anxiety-inducing than a classic game of Jenga? However, this sex game puts a new spin on the timeless nailbiter: each block has a truth or dare question or a challenge etched into it. That means the more the suspense mounts, the more riled up you’ll be from successfully pulling blocks. Take deep breaths, and godspeed.
Best for Beginning Bondage: Tie Me Up Weekend in Bed Bondage Sex Game
Everyone starting their BDSM journey will benefit from this bondage game for couples. “Weekend in Bed” comes with feathered clamps, satin ties, tape, a massage candle (and more!) to get you started towards the sexier side of power. You can use these toys with the forty game cards included, rolling the six-sided dice to determine who gives and who receives. After you finish, keep the goodies to continue playing your own game, picking up whenever the mood strikes.
Best All Around: Monogamy Board Game
No more stale board games here! Monogamy consistently ranks the best sexy game available to couples, topping customer reviews and top ten lists alike. “With three tantalising levels to the sex board game (intimate, passionate and steamy), you can learn more about your partners likes and dislikes as you move around the board picking up different forfeit and dare cards,” reads the game’s info. A review left by one player states, “Played this game last night with the wife. Really opened up some new avenues to pleasure. It was a struggle to stick to the rules and not end the game early. Such a fun game that had us laughing at ourselves and opening up to each other. Even after 9 years of marriage it was a revelation.” Not only is love art, it’s magic like that.